题目内容

16．据报道，在我国仍有很多山区的孩子因为家庭贫穷而上不起学．你们班就如何帮助这些孩子上学进行了讨论．假如你是李华，请你把你们的建议写成一封信寄给Teens的编辑，希望他能够呼吁更多的人参与这项活动．
内容要点：
1．收集旧课本和衣服；
2．你的建议，至少两条；
3．呼吁更多人帮助他们．
注意：1．词数120左右；
2．可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯；
3．开头已写好，不计入总词数．
Dear Editor，
I'm a senior high school student．
             ．
Yours sincerely，Li Hua．

分析 本篇书面表达属于提纲类作文，根据提示信息据报道，在我国仍有很多山区的孩子因为家庭贫穷而上不起学．你们班就如何帮助这些孩子上学进行了讨论．假如你是李华，请你把你们的建议写成一封信寄给Teens的编辑，希望他能够呼吁更多的人参与这项活动．，写作时注意以下几点：1、仔细阅读有关提示，弄清试题提供的所有信息，明确几个要点．2、提纲是文章的总体框架，要在提纲的范围内进行分析、构思和想象．3、根据要表达的内容确定句子的时态、语态；就本文而言应该用一般现在时态．4．注意使用高级词汇和句式，以增加文章的亮点．
（高分句型一）First and foremost，some old textbooks and clothes can be collected and sent to those children so that they can be reused．
该句使用了被动语态，即old textbooks and clothes can be collected and sent；还有so that引导目的状语从句；
（高分句型二）Above all，we should give them respect，never looking down upon them because they are poor
looking down 是现在分词做状语表示伴随状况，we和look之间是主动关系，故使用现在分词；because引导原因状语从句；
高级词汇和句式：First and foremost、What's more、Above all；As far as I'm concerned就我所知；We would appreciate it if you 如果你能…我们会很感激的；look down upon 看不起；appeal to 呼吁；

解答 Dear Editor，
 I'm a senior high school student． It's reported that in China many children in mountainous areas still have no access to school because of poverty．Last week，our class held a discussion about how to help them to go t o school and live a happy childhood．
      Here are our suggestions．（高分句型一）First and foremost，some old textbooks and clothes can be collected and sent to those children so that they can be reused．As far as I'm concerned，we should save some of our pocket money and give it to those children in need．What's more，it's also very important to appeal to more people and social organizations to help and care for those poor children．（高分句型二）Above all，we should give them respect，never looking down upon them because they are poor．（自己的建议）
     We would appreciate it if you can，through the Teens，increase public awareness of the poor children's living conditions and call on more people to help them．（发出呼吁）
                                                                                                     Yours sincerely，
                                                                                                      Li Hua

点评 英语写作是一项主观性较强的测试题．它不仅考查学生的写作基础而且还考查学生在写作过程中综合运用语言的能力．在撰写时要注意主谓语一致，时态呼应，用词贴切等．要提高英语写作水平，需要两方面的训练：一是语言基础方面的训练，要有扎实的造句、翻译等基本功，即用词法、句法等知识造出正确无误的句子；二是写作知识和能力 方面的训练以掌握写作方面的基本方法和技巧．

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11．文中共有10处语言错误，每句中最多有两处．
增加：在缺词处加一个漏字符号（∧），并在其下面写出该加的词．
删除：把多余的词用斜线（\）划掉．
修改：在错的词下划一横线，并在该词下面写出修改后的词．
注：1．每处错误及其修改均仅限一词；
2．只修改10处，多者（从第11处起）不计分．
Dear Miss Li，
I'm one of your student in Class Six，Senior Three．Nowadays I meet a great many difficulties when studied English．To begin with，it is very difficult of me to memorize a large number of new words．In addition，grammar is too complex to understand，that has influenced my English writing seriously．And my performance on reading and correcting are not satisfying．Faced with such a dilemma，you hope that you can give me a hand．Would you provide me with some effectively approaches？Secondly，I believe that I will have good command of what you teach，if you will slow down your speed in the class．There is no doubt whether I will achieve great progress in English learning with your assistance．
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修改：在错的词下划一横线，并在该词下面写上修改后的词．
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