Question

Many people find themselves caught up in others’ problems, and then confused about how and when to help. In fact, all relationships need limits no matter whether they are friendships, sibling relations, mates/ lovers or business relations. On some level, all limit setting means saying no. However, it is usually a qualified “no” that says what, where, when, and under what conditions you will give or not give to another person. There are three points we should keep in mind about limit setting:

1.Decide where to set the limits. Think about the entire situation. Consider your time, emotions, and means. Then consider whether you are helping the other person. Aim to do something to help the other person without taking on the whole problem.

2.Express the limits clearly. For example, you say to your friend, “ I will lend you $20,000 no more than once every three months. And I expect you will pay me back within three months and certainly before you can borrow more.” You say to another friend, “you can stay here for three weeks but you must help me with expenses and cooking and make sure that you will find your own place before the three weeks is up”.

3.Stick to your limits. You are not responsible for making the other person obey the limits. You are only responsible for following the limits yourself. Your friend has repaid $12,500 of his/her $20,000 and asks for $20,000 more. You say no. He/She gets emotional and then says, “I need this money to cover a bad check. If you cared for our friendship, you would do it”.

Limit setting is often stressful and painful because people mistakes it for rejection. And limit setting certainly brings guilt. Bear in mind, it doesn’t mean you have given up or quit loving your friend, lovers, or sibling. It does mean you are expressing that love in a different and more helpful (to both of you) manner.

1.According to the passage, setting limits means___________________.

A. refusing always to say yes to your friend

B. saying no to your friend who turns to you

C. making different kinds of friends

D. breaking away from your friend

2.Once you decide to set limits, you should________________________.

A. announce it publicly to others

B. tell your friend about it clearly

C. be responsible for your friend

D. begin to help your friend

3.We can learn from the last paragraph that limit setting______________.

A. is often misunderstood

B. is actually a kind of rejection

C. does harm to your friendship

D.contains both love and hate

4.What would be the best title for the passage?

A. About friendship

B. How to make friends

C. Set limits with friends

D. Show your love in a new way

Answer 1

1.A

2.B

3.A

4.C

【解析】

试题分析：许多人发现自己正陷入别人的麻烦中无法自拔，并且困惑于应该怎样、何时提供帮助。有技巧地说不，可以很大程度上避免这种麻烦。本文从三个方面向我们介绍了拒绝的技巧。

1.细节理解题。第一段提到，all limit setting means saying no，要敢于对朋友说不，故选A。

2.细节理解题。第三段的小标题Express the limits clearly，将限制向朋友传达清楚，可知选B。

3.推理判断题。最后一段，Limit setting is often stressful and painful because people mistakes it for rejection，限制设置总是让人倍感压力和痛苦,因为别人会误把它当做是拒绝，故选A。

4.主旨归纳题。本文从三个方面阐述了怎样科学地设置限制，从而拒绝别人的请求。故选C。

考点：考查社会文化类阅读